The NCAA Tournament of the Future

March Madness is nearly upon us once again, and for the first time in three years, I'll actually be able to watch it. But as exciting as that may or may not be, the fun's not in watching the games, nor is it in picking the winners. The real fun lies in imagining which teams will make it to the Final Four 100 years in the future!

Before I name my picks for the 2108 Final Four, there are a few things we need to understand about the future of college basketball. One, as a result of the Big Six Conference Wars of the 2040s, most major competitive schools have been destroyed and no longer are part of the NCAA. Mid-major conferences, however, still receive no respect, and the gap is filled mostly by Robot Universities. Two, many student athletes have been killed by the robots. Three, basketball in the future is played on soccer fields and the nets are 50 feet high, in order to make the game more difficult for the robots.

Now my picks:
(2) Robot University of Southern Florida--I expect these guys to pull off the upset over #1 seed Robot University of Utah because while the Utahnanians build their robots with great endurance, they don't build them with much improvisation. The robot team from RUSF, however, is young and eager and sometimes crazy, which could surprise the Utahnanian robots.

vs

(1) Robot University of The Texas Empire--Ever since Texas took over most of Mexico and the South and the Southwest and became "The Texas Empire," they've been an unstoppable juggernaut. They'd be my pick to win it all, but like most robots, they tend to get overconfident and show-boaty, only to get embarrassed by a team of humans or something.

In the other bracket...

(11) George Mason Non-Robots--It's a real long shot I know, especially since they've got some seriously murderous competition in Los Angeles Island and Western Pennsylvania County, whose star center, The Floating Laser Orb, has killed 36 humans already this year, including the entire Lesser Michigan Non-Robot team. But these George Mason Non-Robots, assuming enough of them survive, are the most likley non-robot team to pull out the wins to make it.

vs

(1) Robot University of North Dakota--The team with the biggest robots of all (average team height of 15 1/2 ft) is a lock to make it to the Final Four. They're slightly advantaged too because their bracket has more non-robot teams than the others. Of course, if North Dakota gets nuked in the next week or two, a very likely scenario, this team may not have enough of a power source to make it through more than 2 games.

RUTE over RUSF: 1,061 to 936
RUND over GMNR: 590 to 0

RUND over RUTE: 676 to 669