Trial and Error

Anybody ever see that movie? The one in the subject line. Michael Richards and Jeff Daniels are the odd couple in this comedy romp on the legal system. It's not very good, but I saw it for free thanks to a Papa John's promotion (which also gave us a free Weekend at Bernie's). Life is best when it's free. Am I right fellas?

Anyway, I was trying to think of something to write on the blog, and I started thinking about my friend who's a lawyer*, and that got me thinking about Trial and Error, and then I wondered what it would be like for me to take the place of my lawyer friend in the courtroom. I think it'd go a little something like this....

The Arraignment of Avery Jackson for the Murder of Henry Hoobadoo
Featuring Defense Attorney Paul Ragagagag and Prosecuting Attorney Ben's Friend (secretly replaced by Ben himself), with Honorable Judge Cowudder Presiding

JUDGE COWUDDER: Defendant, how do you plead?
AVERY: Guilty.
BEN (ME): Objection!
DEFENSE ATTORNEY: What?
BEN: He can't plead guilty! Then what am I supposed to do?
JUDGE: Overruled.
BEN: What if I think he didn't do it? Can I overrule his plea?
JUDGE: No.
BEN: Then I plead not guilty.
DEFENSE: Objection.
JUDGE: Sustained.
BEN: Not fair! I didn't do it!
DEFENSE: You're not on trial.
BEN: I move for a mistrial!
JUDGE: Bailiff, please arrest the attorney for contempt.
BEN: Why don't you arrest everybody?
DEFENSE: Objection.
JUDGE: (pause) Overruled.
DEFENSE: What?
JUDGE: Mr. Prosecutor, I've learned a lot from your free spirit, and you're right. We all need to be free like you. Everybody, you're under arrest.
AVERY: PARTAY!!!
(Two go-go dancers in cages rise up from behind the judge's bench.)
DEFENSE: (to Ben, yelling over party noise and awesome mid-nineties hip-hop) Did you even pass the Bar?
BEN: Is that a challenge?
DEFENSE: Is what---
BEN: LIMBO CONTEST!

And I went on to win the limbo contest AND the water balloon fight.


*I actually don't have a friend who's a lawyer, but I have two friends and an acquaintance in law school, and one of my coworker's wives worked in a law office, so I figure that all equals one lawyer friend.