Moderation: A Report

With Groundhog's Day quickly approaching, I'm anxiously awaiting writing a post about that wonderful day. In the meantime, inspired by the imminence of my once second-favorite holiday, I decided that I would set the record straight about my supposed loves and hates.

Robots: Many people believe that I love robots. While this is not far from true, it is greatly exaggerated. My "love" for robots began with my purchase of Short Circuit on DVD about two years ago. What was misconstrued as love was actually a combination of nostalgia for a robot-filled childhood and excitement over buying a decent movie for $5.99. Perhaps I took the robot thing too far in founding the facebook group "Robots are RoHOT," but I regret nothing. My robot fever subsided months later, and I am now back to being a fairweather fan of these mechanical men.

Zombies: Not that there was a real "Ben loves zombies" bandwagon, but even still I feel like I should say that my fascination with zombies was more of a reverent fear than love.

Holidays: My birthday has been my favorite holiday for some time, but just recently I feel like it should be something less selfish. However, I have yet to find a suitable replacement favorite. Groundhog's Day has traditionally held the second-favorite spot, but that was a lie from the beginning. I hate the groundhog and everything he stands for.

Starship: I have professed my hatred for Starship on many occasions, often going so far as saying that I hate Starship more than I hate Satan. There's really nothing to set straight here; my opinion has not changed.

The Color Red: Red used to be my favorite color. It's still great and beats any other color hands down, and I will argue that until I can no longer speak. But I prefer maroon these days.