Note: the names of the people and entities here have been changed to protect the dignity of those involved in this conversation.
Inside a local business establishment...
ME: (addressing one of the establishment's represatives) I'd like to speak to Mr. Menard, please.
PERSON: Um, there is no Mr. Menard.
ME: I'm pretty sure there is.
PERSON: I really don't think so.
ME: Then why is it called Menards?
PERSON: It's not a possessive, sir.
ME: Are you telling me it's plural?
PERSON: No.
ME: Because I have a pretty good vocabulary, and I've never heard of a menard before.
PERSON: It's not plural, sir.
ME: Stop playing games with me.
PERSON: Please keep your voice down.
ME: I demand to speak to Mr. Menard RIGHT NOW!
PERSON: I've told you that there is no Mr. Menard.
ME: This is SERIOUS BUSINESS! I'm not JOKING AROUND!
PERSON: Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to leave.
ME: I can't leave.
PERSON: Why not?
ME: Listen, either you show me to Mr. Menard by the time I count to three, or I will fill this place with so many bear traps, you'll--
PERSON: Security!
ME: Too much of a girl for the bear traps, huh?
1 comment:
Not to break confidentiality, but does PERSON = Mr. Menard himself? Because that would be pretty ironic, don't you think?
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