Off to Thailand

It occurred to me this morning, why not move to Thailand? I don't really have anywhere else to be, at least not for a few months. Thailand seems like as good a place as any.

Before you start wagging your finger at me like I'm an idiot, let's take a look at the pros and cons of this decision. Then we'll see who's the idiot.

PROS
-They have elephants in Thailand, and I think that everyone who lives there gets to have one.
-If they have a monsoon season, it's probably over by now.
-In comparison to other Asian countries, it's significantly better than slightly more than half of them.
-Not communist.
-The majority of the country's population resides above the ground.

CONS
-American Thai food is better than Thai Thai food.
-The King and I, which was set in Thailand, is annoying.
-It's hard to make friends in Thailand because I probably don't speak their language and I doubt we have anything in common.
-The zombie problem is on the verge of getting out of control.
-Laos won't shut up.

The choice is clear. I'll see y'all in Thailand or never again!