The Dog and the Restuarant: Part 1

This is a story about a lady dog by the name of Portland. She lived in relative obscurity in the land of Narnia, where she could never hold a job more than a week. She was a good worker, but everybody she worked with thought she reeked like tacos.

After she lost her job as creative consultant to Two and a Half Centaurs, the Narnian equivalent of Two and a Half Men, Portland decided it would be best to leave Narnia forever.

"I'm through with this jerkwater dimension," she declared as she stormed home to her apartment beneath the onion patch. But before she could take another two steps, Asland appeared before her and blocked the path.

"So you wish to leave Narnia, do you, Portland?" he said.
"Yes."
"I must tell you that it is almost impossible for a Narnian creature to leave Narnia."
"Aw nuts."
"There is one way, but it takes great sacrifice."
"Please tell me, O Aslan."
"Do you have access to the Ninternet?"
"Yes."
"Then go home and visit the blog known as Garbage: Left, Recycling: Right. There you shall find your way."

At that Aslan disappeared. "Oh, thank you, Aslan!" Portland yelled, and she scampered home as quickly as she could.


Meanwhile, in Earth...

Ben said to his coworker, "Today on my blog, every other word I use is going to be a variation of the word 'butt.'"

To be continued...