A Fun Thing

I stole this from Nicole, and since I'm bored at work and it was particularly fun (fun, not funny), I filled it out. And now you're about to read it.

1) My uncle once: accidentally sprayed whipped cream in my face when I was little. Made me hate whipped cream for a really long time.
2) Never again in my life: will I try to think of a serious answer to this question. But even that I can’t promise.
3) When I was five: my brother was two.
4) High School: is actually something that I can feel nostalgic about without feeling paranoid or surreal.
5) I will never forget: nothing because it’s very likely there’s nothing I’ll be able to remember forever.
6) I once met: Davey von Bohelen.
7) There's this girl I know who: put soap something in the John Deere fountain to see if it would overflow. Three times.
8) Once, at a bar: a whole bunch of friends and I sang “What’s Goin’ On?” by Marvin Gaye. Not karaoke. Best bar experience ever.
9) By noon I'm usually: hungry and wishing I didn’t work here.
10) Last night I: saw Mates of State with Maria Taylor and Hockey Night.
11) If I had only: called that girl Stephanie who talked to me on the Greyhound that night back to Madison after Sara and I broke up. If I have any regret, that’s it. Though it probably wouldn’t have gone anywhere anyway.
12) Next time I go to church, I will: not wear a jacket.
14) What worries me most: is anything I pay close attention to for a prolonged period of time, especially what I’m going to do once I quit office jobs forever.
15) When I turn my head right, I see: a set of those stackable inboxes and my Cigna nalgene bottle.
16) When I turn my head left, I see: another set of those stackable inboxes and my coworker Steve.
17) You know I'm lying when: I admit that I’m lying. Otherwise, it’s only kind of obvious.
18) You know what I miss most about the eighties: The lead singers of awesome bands still being alive (I’m talking to you, INXS, Joy Division, and Nirvana).
19) If I was a character written by Shakespeare, I'd be: Hamlet. Not for the shameless primadonna show and everything but for the questionable sanity. No, let me take that back. I’ll say Mercutio.
20) By this time, next year: I will have finished writing my book and feel more aimless than ever.
21) A better name for me would be: Luis.
22) I have a hard time understanding: why anyone would think margarine is better than real butter.
23) If I ever go back to school I'll: no longer live anywhere near this part of the country.
24) You know I like you if: I avoid you completely. Wait, that’s not right.
25) If I won an award, the first person I'd thank would be: Michael Jordan.
26) Darwin, Mozart, Slim Pickens & Geraldine Ferarara....are: names of the new models in Ford’s 2007 line of automobiles.
27) Take my advice, never: step in a pile of cow poo. It’s overrated.
28) My ideal breakfast is: a cinammon raisin bagel. Maybe with cream cheese.
29) A song I love but do not have is: “Senor Burns” by Tito Puente.
30) If you visit my hometown, I suggest: you go to a neighboring town if you want to do anything fun.
31) Tulips, character flaws, microchips & track stars are: gangs I hung out with in my youth.
32) Why won't anyone: give me a high five right now?
33) If you spend the night at my house: you win a free pizza.
34) I'd stop my wedding for: an elephant. Or a rhino.
35) The world could do without: Australia.
36) I'd rather lick the belly of a cockroach than: lick the belly of an uglier cockroach.
37) My favorite blonde is: Sara Daly.
38) Paperclips are more useful than: fingernail clippings.
39) San Diego means: Saint Diego. I’m sure I’m not the first person to say that, but I can rarely resist an opportunity to be literal and not funny.
40) And by the way: the MOON rulz.